Pinches of Idiotin: Article # 5 – A Quiz – Do You Suffer from Idiocy?

Welcome, everyone. For those of you who have been following the articles closely over the past four months, you know all about Type 1 and Type 2 idiotins, and now it’s time to test your idiotinemic health (or, to put it more colloquially, whether or not you’re an idiot).

So, for this month, I’m offering a simple and fun little quiz consisting of ten questions that will help you determine whether or not you suffer from idiotinemia.

New readers, don’t worry—you’ll be able to take the quiz without any trouble. However, if your final score suggests that you suffer from one of the two forms of idiotinemia, it would be a good idea to review the four previous articles to learn more about this condition.

You can keep track of your score using the grid below.

So let’s get started with the first question.

Give yourself 10 points if you’re sometimes tempted to believe it.

Give yourself 100 points if you’re convinced of it.

I also recommend taking a look at the article below.

How Many People Think the Earth is Flat, and Doesn’t Move?

Add 10 points if you’ve been married a second time.

100 points if you’ve been remarried two or more times.

Subtract 50 points if your new spouse is at lea$t twice a$ rich a$ you.

Subtract another 50 points if your new spouse is at least twenty years older than you.

Your grandmother, who was celebrating her 88th birthday at a bar downtown, died in a car accident on her way home at 3:00 a.m. Throughout her life :

(1) She smoked a pack of cigarettes a day;

(2) She drank two glasses of whiskey every night because, she said, it helped her sleep better;

(3) Every winter, she treated herself to a week in the south to soak up the sun. She never put a single drop of sunscreen on herself.

Based on these assumptions, you’re convinced that you’ve inherited these rock-solid genes and that you’ll never get cancer.

So you take advantage of this to live a degenerate lifestyle.

Give yourself ten points.

Give yourself 10 points.

Give yourself 100 points if the temperature is near freezing.

Give yourself 10 points if you canceled your plane ticket.

Give yourself 10 more points if you’re a Sagittarius.

Add 100 more points to your score if you actually added 10 more points just because you’re a Sagittarius.

If that’s the case, give yourself 10 points.

Actually, you don’t really care whether you get into an accident or not. The crucifix is there so that God will protect you from traffic tickets.

Give yourself another 10 points.

Take away 8 points if you’ve just realized this is completely ridiculous and you remove the crucifix.

Add back 20 points if you remove the crucifix while you’re driving.

A guy is running for office..

And that’s not all—he also promises to:

We’re being lenient—just give yourself ten points.

This same individual is elected, and during his four-year term, he does virtually nothing he promised.

To make matters worse, during his term, the planet is hit by a viral pandemic. His handling of the crisis results in his country’s mortality rate being at least twice as high as that of any other country.
He loses his reelection bid, refuses to concede defeat, and nearly stages a coup in an attempt to remain in office.
He is ultimately forced to leave office, but he continues to cry foul without ever providing any evidence.
Four years later, he runs for office again.