Welcome, everyone.  We continue our exploration of the metabolic depths of human stupidity.  This month, we’ll explain the mechanism of action of Type 2 Idiotin. 

Make yourself comfortable and pour yourself a good cup of coffee (or even a little aperitif)—this might get a bit complicated.  On the other hand, if you understand everything, it will be a sign that you do not suffer from idiotinemia (although some will argue, not without reason, that you have to be a bit of an idiot to spend time reading this article).

You’ll recall that unlike type 1 idiotin production, type 2 production is said to be inducible; various stressors can stimulate the secretion of this protein in different biological fluids, lasting anywhere from a few hours to several days.   As a reminder, here is the list of some stressors or factors I had identified that can cause increased production of type 2 idiotin:

• Alcohol and other recreational drugs
• Age (peak production between the ages of 10 and 20)
• Lust and other forms of non-platonic love
• True love (idiotinemia can even degenerate into blindness)
• Greed
• Donald Trump
• Tobacco
• Coffee purchased at the drive-thru of certain fast-food chains
• Social media
• The need to impress one’s neighbors

To better understand the presentation that follows, I will once again show you the three-dimensional structure of the type 2 idiotin.

How does Idiotin type 2 affect the brain?

The picture is a bit complex, but I’ll try to keep it simple.

Type 2 Idiotin is a fairly large protein (423 amino acids) found in the bloodstream that cannot cross what is known as the blood-brain barrier (BBB).  As a result, it cannot enter the brain, the organ it needs to access in order to cause the disruptions leading to idiotinemia

Figure 2 – A bewildered idiotin finding itself at the threshold of the blood-brain barrier (in reality, things don’t quite happen this way, but since my electron microscope is in for repairs, I had to make do with what I had on hand to illustrate the situation.

It’s important to note that despite its considerable size for a protein, only a tiny, minuscule fragment of type 2 idiotin—a 15-amino acid segment—is responsible for all the damage (see the figure below). 

Figure 3 – Enlarged view of the idiotinogenic section of type 2 idiotin.

This is where it gets interesting: if we cut type 2 idiotin on either side of this small protein fragment, we obtain what is known in chemistry as a “peptide,” which is immediately released into the bloodstream.  Given its small size and structure, this peptide manages to cross the blood-brain barrier and thereby reach the brain, the playground where this little troublemaker can wreak all its havoc.

Before going any further, I reread what I’ve written and realize that I’ve referred to this “little fragment that causes all the damage” two or three times now, which doesn’t sound very serious for a peptide.  I therefore propose using an acronym to identify this peptide.  For this acronym, I will base it on the following observations :

• This peptide being temporarily present in the biological fluid to be tested, let qualify it as transient or temporary (T);
• The test would measure the concentration of the peptide in a biological fluid, hence its rate (R);
• I like having a vowel in the middle of an acronym.  Since this peptide is found throughout the body (blood, urine, saliva, etc.), we could describe it as ubiquitous (U);
• Once in the brain, this pesky peptide will modulate the development of idiotic behaviors.  We are therefore referring to a modulator (M);
• The idiotic behaviors caused by this peptide or factor can certainly be considered as psychopathologies (P).

This factor therefore constitutes the Transient Rate of a Ubiquitous Modulator of  Psychopathologies

We have therefore just identified the TRUMP factor, a new phenomenon that links type 2 idiotin to the erratic behaviors observed in a number of individuals. 

That’s all well and good, but I can already see the next question coming:

How is this darn peptide, the TRUMP factor, extracted from type 2 idiotin?

In nature, the function of protein cleavage is usually performed by a class of proteins called “enzymes.”  Like a pair of scissors, the enzyme cuts its target (its “substrate”) at a very specific site, resulting in the release of the cleaved peptide. 

Extensive research—conducted, of course, in my basement lab—led me to identify the enzyme capable of cleaving type 2 idiotin.  It is a new enzyme not found in the human body.  In one of those lyrical moments that sometimes overtake me,  I nicknamed this enzyme the  ‘Reason-Frailing Kinase’. For more convenience, from now on, I will use its acronym (RFK) for the remainder of this presentation.

RFK, the enzyme that turns people into fools

This expression immediately reminds me of “Radjaïdjah,” the “poison that drives people mad,” the villains’ weapon in *Cigars of the Pharaoh* and *The Blue Lotus*, those two magnificent Tintin albums (which I’m really in the mood to reread after finishing this article).   It’s important to note, however, that the Radjaïdjah caused permanent madness, unlike the TRUMP factor, which is transient.  Perhaps we can devote a future article to that.  Getting back to RFK, despite its name, it isn’t really a kinase—a term referring to an enzyme that catalyzes a phosphorylation reaction.  I named it that because I think it sounds nicer than Reason-Frailing Protease (which should be its real name).   There are precedents, mind you: enterokinase is also a protease and not a kinase.  So, if others are allowed to attach the word “kinase” to all sorts of enzymes, I don’t see why I should deprive myself of that.  Let’s close this parenthesis..

So, I hear you rightly asking :

How can RFK, an enzyme not found in humans, cleave type 2 Idiotin, which, for its part, happily circulates in the human bloodstream?

Well, RFK is caused by a virus named Human HerpesVirus 10 (HHV-10).   Far be it from me to panic you, but this is a brand-new strain identified by the famous Chinese lab  from which the COVID-19 virus escaped (will we ever be done with these guys?).  

My initial screening tests suggest that 30 to 40% of children are infected with this virus from a very young age, without showing any symptoms of illness. Like all herpes viruses, HHV-10 will hide in the cells it infects—in this case, nerve cells near the individual’s spinal cord—where it will remain dormant.  Until now, HHV-10 was believed to be completely harmless, which is why no one has ever sought to investigate this asymptomatic carrier state.  I believe I am the first to report such a harmful effect of HHV-10, for which I am truly sorry, believe me.  

Let’s start with a theoretical example to show you how it works:

The short video below offers a metaphorical portrayal of the frenzy driving the little TRUMP factor on this occasion.

(TRUMP factor expressing joy at being released into the bloodstream)

Once in the brain, the peptide will attack the neurons and cause these transient episodes of type 2 idiotinemia :

1. The individual will believe everything his entourage tells him, fail to verify this information, and decide to attack the small country, convinced that it will be a week-long affair and that the final outcome will establish him as the greatest head of state of all time.
2. Overnight, he therefore orders his army to attack the small country and destroy its alleged nuclear arsenal.
3. In the early days, everything goes according to plan.  However, the small country holds a trump card that the head of state and his informants had overlooked: the country borders a strait 60–90 km wide through which 30% of the world’s oil traffic passes.
4. Not to be outdone, the small country will use everything at its disposal (drones, mines, cannons, slingshots) to block all ships passing through the area, immediately triggering a chain reaction that leads to a global oil supply crisis.
5. One of the dominoes in this cascade of events will be to cause new stress for the head of state and, as a result, new outbreaks of Type 2 idiotin and HHV-10.
6. Increasingly stressed, the head of state will make more blunders and display more idiotic behavior, which will keep the crisis going for months.     

I’ll leave you to figure out what happens next.

It therefore appears that if we could develop a diagnostic test to measure the concentration of TRUMP factor in blood, urine, or saliva, we could better identify people exhibiting idiotic behavior in order to potentially treat them or even prevent such behavior before it occurs.   My current work therefore consists of developing a rapid test to detect and even quantify the TRUMP factor.  To be continued.

And by way of conclusion, for the same price, a Fun Fact :

As part of the discovery of this TRUMP factor, a 15-amino acid peptide, I was able to identify its sequence.  For my readers who are less familiar with these biochemical concepts, proteins and peptides are chains made up of building blocks called “amino acids.”  Twenty (20) types of amino acids can be used to form a protein.  Each protein will have its own specific amino acid sequence.  The table below lists these 20 amino acids with their full names as well as the two types of designations used to identify them: a three-letter code and a one-letter code.   

Using the three-letter code, the TRUMP factor sequence consists of the following 15 amino acids:

His-Glu-Gly-Ser-Glu-Thr-His-Ile-Ser-Ile-Asn-Ser-Ala-Asn-Glu

Personally, I prefer using the one-letter code—it’s just shorter.   This time, the TRUMP factor becomes:

H E G S E T H  I S  I N S A N E

It’s also important to know that when the peptide is cleaved, it loses its original conformation since it is no longer subject to the influence of the rest of the idiotin molecule.   The figure below shows the conformation of the TRUMP factor before and after cleavage by RFK.

Figure 4 – Conformational change of the TRUMP factor following cleavage by RFK.

Preliminary results also suggest that reading my novel ‘L’Idiotine’ has the effect of accelerating the degradation of type 2 idiotin molecules.  I’m not showing you the results just yet because I still need 10,000 readers to validate this hypothesis in a statistically significant way.  I therefore encourage you to get a copy of my novel L’Idiotine by visiting the websites listed on the ‘Roman L’Idiotine’ page above or by ordering it from your usual bookseller. 

In a future article, I’ll provide you with a fun little quiz to assess your levels of type 2 idiotin before and after reading my novel.

That’s all for today.